Disclaimer：This play is adapted from the movie Despicable Me 2. Copyrights belong to Universal Pictures. Do not reproduce it to anywhere without my permission. 免责声明：本剧改编自同名电影《神偷奶爸2》。版权归美国环球影业所有。未经许可，禁止转载。

CAST

1、Gru：格鲁；男。前职业大恶人，现超级奶爸。

2、Lucy：露西；女。职业特工。

Jillian：吉莉安，格鲁的好友。

还有我们可爱的小黄人！！！

pia前提示：

1. 该本时长约为30 min，请各位预留出足够的时间，尽量不要跳车。

2. 该本为男女双普，当然男男或者女女也没问题。

3. 该本正常流程为等Bgm不等人，如遇到特殊情况请主持手动按照音效提示暂停或拉动BGM。

4. 音效前都有明确时间标注。请注意音效中的“同”和“后”。“场景：”不是音效！“场景：”不是音效！“场景：”不是音效！

5. 该本可以在百变/戏鲸中pia戏使用，请勿在未经允许的情况下将录音等内容上传至其他平台。

5. 该本改编自电影《神偷奶爸2》，仅截取改编部分主线剧情。完整剧情请观看电影。

环境：格鲁家的后院

场景：扮成“仙女公主”的格鲁在女儿的生日派对上遭遇好友吉莉安试图给他介绍对象。

00:00 音乐起直接入

Jillian：Hey there, Gru, Mr. Life of the Party! 

Gru: （强颜欢笑）Hello, Jillian. 

Jillian：Sooooo, I'm gonna go out on a limb here, but my friend Natalie is recently single, and...

场景：娜塔莉倚靠在自助餐台旁，对格鲁挑逗地挑起眉毛。随即，餐桌轰然倒塌。

00:14 坍塌声后

Gru: No, no, no, get off of the limb right now. No limb. 

Jillian：Ohoho~ come on, she's a riot. She sings karaoke, she has a lot of free time, looks aren't that important to her...

Gru：（严肃拒绝）No, Jill's, that is not happening. Seriously. I'm fine. 

Jillian: Okay, fine. Forget Natalie. How about my cousin Linda?

Gru：No.

Jillian：Oh, oh! I know someone whose husband just died!

场景：格鲁不耐烦地拿起水龙头浇了吉莉安一脸。

00:37 浇水声后

Gru：I'm sorry. I did not see you there.（ 00:42 浇水声伴随吉莉安惊呼声后）Or there. 

环境：格鲁家门前

场景：露西特工在上司的指示下找到了传说中的前恶人——格鲁。

00:47 转场

Gru：（平静）Kyle, Kyle!（大吼）Ky, Kyle! No, do not do your business on the petunias! （平静）There you go. Those are Fred's. Go crazy.

场景：凯尔尿在邻居家的花上，花丛瞬间枯萎死亡

01:04 凯尔尿尿声后

Gru: （轻笑）Good boy.

Lucy: Mr. Gru?

Gru: （惊吓）Wha? I didn't, What, Yes?

Lucy: Hi! Agent Lucy Wilde of the AVL.（发现证件拿反了）Oh. Whoops.（清嗓，严肃）Sorry, you're gonna have to come with me. 

Gru：（突然袭击）Oh, sorry, I- FREEZE RAY! 

场景：格鲁突然掏出冰冻射线枪偷袭，露西一脸平静地掏出火焰喷射枪反制。

01:24 对波声后

Lucy：You know, you really should announce your weapons after you fire them, Mr. Gru. For example--

场景：露西手中的口红突然发射出电极片，电得格鲁浑身抽搐。

01:35 电击声同

Lucy：（兴奋）Lipstick Taser!（01:40 格鲁倒地声后）Oh, it works so good.

场景：露西试图将昏迷的格鲁装进车里。

01:43 汽车声，碰撞声后

Lucy：Oh, sorry.

01:52 一连串响声同

Lucy: （用力，一字一顿）Get! In! There! you! Big! Man! 

环境：AVL海底总部

场景：露西成功“捕获”格鲁，将他带到了传说中的“反恶人联盟”总部。

02:01 转场

02:04 汽车开门声，格鲁摔倒声后

Gru：（难受）Ah... where... ah... whoa curses. Ah... pins and needles... 

02:15 Silas：Good afternoon, Mr. Gru. 

Gru：Ehhh... 

02:18 Silas：I apologize for our methods in getting you here. 

Lucy：I don't. Hhh... I'd do it again in a heartbeat. I am not gonna lie, I enjoyed that. Every second of it. Gave me a bit of a buzz, actually. 

02:29 Silas：That's enough, Agent Wilde. 

Lucy：Sorry, sir. 

Gru：（愤怒）Okay, this is bogus! I don't know who you people think you are, but-- 

02:37 Silas：We are the Anti-Villain League. An ultra-secret organization dedicated to fighting crime on a global scale. Rob a bank? We're not interested. Kill someone? Not our deal. But you want to melt the polar ice caps? Or vaporize Mt. Fuji? Or even steal the moon? Then we notice. 

Gru：First of all, you've got no proof that I did that. Second, after I did do that, I put it back! 

03:09 Silas：We're well aware of that, Mr. Gru. That's why we've brought you here. I am the League's director, Silas Ramsbottom. 

03:17 Tom：Bottom. Heeheheeeeheeehee.

03:21 Silas: Hilarious. Agent Wilde...

Lucy：Oh, me now...?（严肃转抓马）Um, recently an entire top secret lab disappeared from the Arctic Circle. Yeah, the entire lab. Just whoosh-- Voom! Gone. Where did it go? 

Gru：I don't care.

Lucy：The lab was devoted to experiments involving PX-41, a transmutation serum. What is PX-41, you ask? Mmmm, it's pretty bad. Look. 

场景：投影中显出PX-41血清实验录像，兔子瞬间变成紫色尖牙巨兔杀害了实验员。

03:50 惨叫声，吼声后

Gru: Ho, you usually don't see that in bunnies. 

04:02 Silas：As you can see, in the wrong hands, the PX-41 serum could be the most devastating weapon on earth. Fortunately, it has a very distinct chemical footprint, and using the latest chemtracking technology, we found traces of it in the Paradise Mall. 

Gru：Ha! A mall? 

04:24 Silas：Precisely. And we believe that one of these shop owners is a master criminal. And that's where you come in. As an ex-villain, you know how a villain thinks, how a villain acts. 

Lucy：The plan is to set you up undercover at a shop in the mall, where hopefully you'll be able to-- 

Gru：（打断）Okay--! I see where this is going, with all the Mission Impossible stuff, but no. No! I am a father now. And a legitimate businessman. I am developing a line of delicious jams and jellies. 

04:53 Silas: Jams and jellies? 

Gru：（被冒犯）Oh, attitude~! That's right! So thanks, but no thanks. And here's a tip, instead of tasing people and kidnapping them, maybe you should just give them a call! Good day, Mr. Sheepsbutt! 

05:12 Silas：Ramsbottom. 

Gru：（戏谑）Oh, yeah, like that's any better!

05:15 小黄人笑声，开门声后

Lucy：Look, I probably shouldn't be saying this, but your work as a villain was kind of amazing, so if you ever want to get back to doing something awesome. give us a call. 

场景：格鲁和小黄人们只能大半夜划着皮划艇回家。

05:33 Tom：Mack-oh! Mack-oh! Mack-oh! ("Stroke! Stroke! Stroke!") 

环境：商场内

场景：格鲁最终还是接下了这个活儿，来到了AVL为他准备的蛋糕店。

05:43 转场

Gru：Hm. "Bake My Day." Blurr. 

05:52 开门风铃声后

Gru：Alright, here is the cupcake recipe I got off the internet. And don't go nuts with the sprinkles! 

场景：格鲁被露西吓了一跳，纸杯蛋糕飞上半空，被露西全部击碎，其中一块儿砸在了格鲁的脑袋上。

06:05 Lucy：Ha! Yaa! Ho! Ooof! Zaaa! Ay-ay-ay-ay-ay! 

06:18 乱七八糟动静停止后

Lucy：Whoo. Wasn't expecting that. Or was I?（尴尬）Ooh, you, you got, you got umm... a little bit... Here, I'll, I'll get it. Oh, that's just spreading, um...

Gru：All right. All right, I got it. I got it, STOP IT! 

Lucy：Oh! I'll let you get it. Yeah, what you just saw there was a little something new I've been working on. It's a combination of Jujitsu, Krav Maga, Aztec warfare, and krumping. 

Gru：Okay, that's weird, why are you here? 

Lucy：On assignment from Silas. I'm your new partner. Yay! 

Gru：What?! No, no "yay." Ramsbottom didn't say anything about a partner.

Lucy：Well, seems that because of your checkered past, everyone else refused to work with you. But not me. I stepped up. And I'm new, so I kind of have to do what they tell me anyway.

07:14 Dave：Walla! 

场景：一个小黄人端着纸杯蛋糕走出后厨，被露西连同蛋糕一起锤在桌上。

07:16 击打声，尖叫声后

Lucy：（严肃）You know this guy? 

Gru：Yes, he's one of my minions. 

Lucy：Oh, I'm sorry. I should have known. You're free to go. 

场景：两人正在研究商城内的各家老板。

07:29 新音乐起同

Gru：Now, what do we got? Who's on the list? Fire them at me. 

Lucy：First suspect, Hedda Blumentoft, proprietor of Mum's the Word Floral Shop. 

Gru：No. Not her. 

Lucy：Okay, moving on... Chuck Kinney, owner of "Stuff-A-Bear." 

场景：气球店老板把小男孩的气球充炸了。

07:49 气球爆炸声后

Lucy：Ooh. 

Gru：I don't think so. 

场景：隔壁餐厅老板爱德华多突然来访，两人吓了一跳，慌忙停止侦察。

07:54 Eduardo ：Hello? 

07:56 乱七八糟音效

07:59 Eduardo: Buenos días, my friends! I am Eduardo Perez, owner of Salsa and Salsa Restaurant, across the mall. Now open for breakfast. And you are? 

Gru：Gru. And this is Lucy. And we are closed. 

08:14 Eduardo：This is just gonna take un momento. I am throwing a big Cinco de Mayo party, and I am going to need two hundred of your best cupcakes decorated with the Mexican flag. It looks something like this. What do you think?

场景：爱德华多一把拉开衣领，露出胸毛下印着的墨西哥国旗。

08:33 Eduardo：Anyway, I have to go. It's all settled! I pick them up next week! Have a good day. Come by if you get a chance, okay? 

场景：爱德华多突然去而复返，格鲁看着他想起了一位故人。

08:44 Eduardo：And welcome to the mall family! 

08:48 格鲁吸气声，阴森的音乐，关门铃声后

Gru: （小声）El Macho. 

Lucy：What? 

Gru：（小声）But it couldn't be... 

Lucy：Wha, What? What couldn't be??

Gru：That guy looks exactly like a villain named El Macho. From about twenty years ago.（语速适中，配合音乐）He was ruthless. He was dangerous. And as the name implies, very macho. He had a reputation for pulling off heists using only his bare hands. Ah, but sadly, like all the greats, El Macho was gone too soon. He died in the most macho way possible. Riding a shark with 250 pounds of dynamite strapped to his chest into the mouth of an active volcano. It was glorious. 

Lucy：（疑惑）Yeah, sounds like El Macho's pretty dead... 

Gru：They never found the body. Oh no. All that was ever retrieved was a pile of singed chest hair. But that face. It has got to be El Macho. 

Lucy：Then what do you say you and I break into his restaurant? Tonight.

Gru：Yes, that's good, because I'm telling you, if anybody in this place has the PX-41 serum... it's him. 

环境：晚间商场内

场景：俩人“潜入”爱德华多的餐厅，试图寻找线索。

10:35 转场

Gru：（小声）We're stealth ninjas. We make no sound.

Lucy：Right. Gotcha.

场景：露西猛地一脚踹开餐厅大门。

10:42 踹门声后

Gru：Alright, El Macho, you're going down.

Lucy：Wait! Wait!

Gru：What?

场景：露西拿出一瓶喷雾四处喷洒。

10:52 喷雾声同

Gru：What are you doing? 

Lucy：I'm checking for laser beam alarm triggers. 

Gru：（无语）It's a restaurant! 

Lucy：You never know what kind of booby traps this guy could have set. Huh? C'mon! 

Gru：There are no booby traps! 

场景：格鲁触发了地上的绊线，铃铛警报响起。

11:05 铃铛声后

Lucy：Ha! Booby! 

场景：突然，后厨大门洞开。一条黑影钻出，吓了两人一跳。

11:09 音乐渐进，鸡叫声后

Lucy：Oh. There's a chicken. Are you lost little guy? You must be lost! 

Gru：Ha! Some guard dog.

场景：公鸡突然对格鲁发起进攻，打得他毫无还手之力。一番争斗后，露西用环氧树脂枪困住了它。

11:25 打斗声，鸡叫声，环氧树脂凝固声，音乐停止后

Lucy：What is wrong with that chicken?（小玩笑）Hey, that pollo? Is loco.（轻笑）No?（严肃）Okay, let's go. 

11:47 新音乐起同

Gru：（小声）You getting anything? 

Lucy：No. Not yet. But hey, maybe you can find something with these x-ray goggles. 

Gru：（叹气）

Lucy：How're they working? Tell me, tell me! 

场景：格鲁一转头，X射线眼镜内出现了露西的“裸体”。

Gru：（惊吓）Ahh! Ooof! 

Lucy：What's wrong? Something wrong? 

Gru：Oh, that's an image I'll never get out of my brain. Blagh!（ 12:10 找到保险箱滴滴声后）I knew it! The serum is in here! 

Lucy：Ooh, then let's get it! 

Gru：（奸笑）Oh, this is going to be good! Ahh... 

场景：格鲁将破解器贴在保险箱上，箱门洞开，却发现里面只是莎莎秘方酱料。

12:25 滴滴声，保险箱开门声后

Gru：A-ha!（震惊）What? This... is... salsa? 

Lucy：Awww man.

环境：商场内

场景：隔天，两人再次来到商场。这次他们扮成了垃圾桶，转换了嫌疑目标。

12:42 转场

Lucy：All right, there he is. Suspect number 8, Floyd Eaglesan.

Gru：Oh. Okay.

Lucy：See if you can get closer. Go, go.

场景：为了躲避热咖啡，格鲁从电梯上摔了下去，碰巧遇到女儿们。

12:56 乱七八糟音效

13:07 Agnes：Hey Gru! 

Gru：Oh! Girls! What are you doing here? 

13:11 Margo：Well, we thought we'd come visit you at work. So, you're saving the world in a garbage can? 

Gru：Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, funny. 

Lucy：Hey, there you are. Oh, who's this? 

Gru：Lucy, these are my girls, Margo, Edith and Agnes. Girls, Lucy. Lucy, girls. 

13:29 Margo：Hello.

13:30 Edith：Hi.

13:31 Agnes：Are you single?

Lucy：Oh! Goodness... 

Gru：（尴尬）Ah! Hey! I have an idea! Since Lucy and I have lots of work to do, why don't you girls go and explore the mall! Here is some money. Go buy some useless mall junk! Some headbands, and--

13:46 Agnes：Are you gonna marry Lucy? 

Gru：Are you out of your gourd? No! She just works with me. 

13:52 Agnes：Plus you love her. You love her, you love her, you really really love her-- 

Gru：Okay, stop! That is a song of lies. I don't even like her! Now go have fun! 

14:01 小女孩们笑声，格鲁叹气声

14:04 Agnes：Almost forgot! Hugs! 

14:06 Margo：Good luck saving the world. Bye! 

14:08 Agnes：Bye, Gru! 

Gru：（尴尬）Hahaha! Kids, right? They're funny. 

Lucy：Those girls totally adore you. I bet you're a fun dad. 

Gru：Huh. I am pretty fun. 

场景：格鲁戴上腰带监视器扮成客人一探究竟，露西在蛋糕店内分析情报。

14:25 新音乐起同

Gru：All right, I'm going in. 

Lucy：（以下全程电话音）If it picks up any traces of the serum the sensor in your belt buckle-- will make a sound like this--mee-mo-mee-mo-mee-mo!!! 

Gru：（不耐烦）Okay! I get it! I get it! 

14:42 Floyd：Welcome to Eagle Hair Club. It's about time you showed up, Mr. Gru.（鸟叫）

Gru：You know my name? 

14:55 Floyd：When someone moves into the mall who is follically challenged, I make it my business to know all about them. You are bald. And that is bad. There you go, my sweet. 

Lucy：I'm getting nothing so far. I think you need to move around. 

Gru：（浮夸）Wow, this looks interesting. What is it? 

15:17 Floyd：I take it you're an art lover? 

Lucy：（快速）No serum. 

Gru：Yeah, not so much. Oh, how about this impressive trinket? 

15:24 Floyd：I'd hardly call it a trinket, Mr. Gru. 

Lucy：（快速）Nothing. 

15:26 Floyd：The International-- 

Gru：Yeah, I don't care. 

场景：格鲁在一个货架前假装伸懒腰，露西透过腰带看见了血清样本。

15:28 警报声同

Lucy：Mee-mo-mee-mo!!! Hold on. I'm picking up something! Behind that wall! 

Gru：Ah! And what do we have here? 

15:35 Floyd：These are my trial wigs. You should take one. 

Gru：No thanks. So what's on the other side of the wall? 

15:42 Floyd：Here you are! Look at me! Focus! 

Lucy：Gru? 

15:45 Floyd：I promise that this wig will transform you from ugly to irresistible. 

15:53 Agnes：Margo has a boyfriend! 

15:55 Edith：And they're going on a date! 

Gru：Date??? Boyfriend??? What??? 

环境：AVL海底总部

场景：格鲁因为女儿被爱德华多的儿子迷住而大发雷霆。

16:00 转场

16:01 Silas：I'm sorry, El Macho? Hadn't we eliminated him as a suspect? After the whole salsa incident? 

Gru：（立刻接）Yes, but there has been a new development, and I'm telling you, this is the guy. You need to arrest him immediately. And his deviously charming son. I'm pretty sure that the son is involved, too. The son also. You've got to get the son.（小声）I think that the son is the mastermind. There's a look. There's a devilish look in his eyes and I don't like it! 

16:33 Silas：Yes, but I don't really see any evidence for-- 

Gru：（打断）Evidence schmevidence! I go with my gut, and my gut tells me that this guy is El Macho! Lock him up! Lock up the son. Don't forget about the son. The kid gives me the creeps! 

16:48 Silas：Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear... 

Lucy：Uh, but, on the less（吹口哨）"crazy" side of things, uh, Gru discovered traces of the serum at Eagle Hair Club. 

16:58 Silas：Hm. Interesting... 

Lucy：Yeah, and you know who made that happen? Huh? This guy. Nailed it. Amazing, right? 

Gru：No. I mean, sure, but it's not him. It is（小声）El Macho. 

17:10 Silas：Mr. Gru. Please-- 

Gru：No. It is him! And I will prove it! 

Lucy：Gru, c'mon!（尴尬轻笑）Hhh... He really thinks it's El Macho. Can you tell? 

环境：一家意式餐厅内

场景：格鲁没坳过好友吉莉安，不得不出来与她的闺蜜珊侬约会。恰巧露西也来到同一家餐厅取餐。

17:28 转场

Lucy：Hi. Takeout for Lucy? 

17:32 Hostess：Sure, just a sec. 

场景：露西转头看见戴着假发的格鲁，立刻潜过去打开监听器。

17:36 Shannon：Your accent is so exotic. 

Gru：Ah. Well, thank you very much. I was-- 

17:42 Shannon：I know someone who can fix that for you. And you'll be talking normal in no time. 

Gru：Hahaha. Hoooo. Is it hot in here? Oof. How's the food? 

场景：格鲁擦汗时不小心抹歪了假发。

17:56 Shannon：Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Are you wearing a wig? 

Gru：What? Ah!（尴尬）I don't think so. 

18:02 Shannon：I knew it. You're a phony. I hate phonies. 

Gru：Oh. What? No. These locks are all mine... 

18:09 Shannon：No they're not! You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna rip that thing off your head and show everyone what a bald-headed phony you are. 

Lucy：I don't think so, Miss Lady. 

场景：千钧一“发”之际，露西远远一针镇静剂射在珊侬的屁股上。

18:18 电子声，飞镖声，脸砸盘子上声后

Gru：Hello. Hello, are you...

Lucy：Hey, Gru. 

Gru：（惊喜）Hello, Lucy, how you doing? 

Lucy：Wow, looks like your date's out for the count. It's like she's been shot with a mild moose tranquilizer. 

18:35 Shannon：Nooooo...

18:37 脸砸盘子上声后

Lucy：（轻声）Yeah, I'm winking cuz that's what actually happened. 

18:44 Italian Waiter：`Scusi, whassa happenin' here? She no like? 

Lucy：Oh, she's just uh--（模拟灌酒）grrr-grrr-grrr.

18:51 Italian Waiter：Oh, oh, sì, sì... 

场景：俩人非常粗暴地把珊侬送回了家。

18:54 关门声，格鲁用力声后

Lucy：Well, I think you did it. You just officially had the worst date ever. 

Gru：Huh, tell me about it. 

Lucy：Don't worry, it can only get better from here, right? But if it doesn't, you can always borrow my dart gun. I've had to use it on one or two dates myself. 

Gru：Yeah, you know, as far as dates go, I think I'm good with just the one. 

Lucy：Well, good night, partner. This was fun. 

Gru：Yes. Surprisingly, it was. 

Lucy：（小声）Oh, and uh, just between you and me? You look much better bald. Mua! See you tomorrow!

环境：商场内

场景：陷入恋爱状态的格鲁兴奋地走进商场，却突然得知噩耗。

19:36 转场

Gru：Mr. Ramsbottom? 

19:40 Silas：Oh, hello. 

Gru：What are you doing here? 

19:43 Silas：We got him. 

Gru：Got who? 

19:45 Silas：Floyd Eaglesan! Our agents located a secret room in his shop last night, and uh, discovered this! It's empty, but we found traces of the PX-41 serum in it. He's our man. So somehow, in spite of your incompetence, we solved this one. 

20:02 Floyd：I was framed! You won't get away with this! Get your mitts off of me! I am a legitimate businessman...

Gru：Alright. So what now? 

20:11 Silas：Well, now you're free to go back to your "business." Mmmm. Jams and jellies. And it looks like Agent Wilde will be transferring to our Australian branch. 

Gru：（震惊）Australia? 

20:23 Silas：Yes. But thank you for everything. And by everything of course I mean nothing. Toodle pip and cheerio, Mr. Gru. 

20:33 脚步声后

（以下情绪略伤感，节奏不要太快）

Lucy：Hey there. 

Gru：Hey. 

Lucy：So, we got him. 

Gru：（强颜欢笑）Yay. That's great. And now you're going to Australia? 

Lucy：Well, it's not definite yet. Still figuring it out. Already been working on my accent. Wallaby. Diggeri-doo. Hugh Jackman. So, um. Pretty excited... 

Gru：Great. Well, good luck. 

Lucy：Thanks. You too. Oh. Here. I wanted to give you this.

Gru：Your lipstick taser? 

Lucy：Yeah, it's just a memento. Just, you know, from the first time we met. 

Gru：Oh. Thank you, Lucy.  

21:22 Silas：Agent Wilde?

Gru：Well, it looks like they need you, so... 

Lucy：Yeah, I uh, I better go. Bye, Gru. 

环境：爱德华多的私人庄园

场景：失恋的格鲁受邀带着女儿们前来赴宴，却意外发现爱德华多的真实身份和邪恶计划。爱德华多很欣赏格鲁，邀请他一起统治世界。

21:37 转场

21:39 El Macho：Together! I have admired your work for years, amigo. Stealing the moon?! Are you kidding?! We would be unstoppable! Men like you, men like me, we should be ruling the world! So, are you in? 

21:58 Dr. Nefario：Woo-hoo! 

Gru：Uh, yeah, probably. 

22:03 El Macho：Probably? 

Gru：I mean, yes! Yes. Of course, yes, I just have a lot going on right now. I just need to get some things off my plate before we start taking over the world, that's all. 

22:16 El Macho：Excuse me? 

Gru：No, no, forget it! One hundred percent! I am in!（假装）I think, what is, do you hear that? I do. That's Agnes calling me from on the surf. Totally in! 

场景：格鲁假装应和着后退进入电梯，飞速拍打按钮。

22:34 El Macho：You know what? I am not so convinced that he is in.

场景：露西在前往澳大利亚的飞机上发现自己深爱着格鲁，于是跳机后前往爱德华多的庄园寻找他。

22:38 新音乐起同

Lucy：（撞到人）Oops, sorry! 

场景：爱德华多的公鸡发现了“老仇人”，尖叫着扑了过来。

22:42 音乐渐进，鸡叫声，啄露西的包声

22:52 El Macho：Hey! Chichi! Pollito! What's the matter? 

Lucy：Oh, hey! Eduardo! 

22:56 El Macho：Lucía! I apologize. Pollito, he's usually not like this. The same thing happened the other day with, with Gru and... 

Lucy：Oh, speaking of Gru, uh, have you seen him? I really need to talk to him. 

23:13 El Macho：Yes, I think he's somewhere around here. You two are close, no? 

Lucy：Oh, I don't know. I mean close. I wouldn't say we were close.（期待）Why, did he say we were close? Did he say that? 

23:25 El Macho：It's more what he didn't say. For instance, he never mentioned that you were both working for the Anti-Villain League!!! You're coming with me. 

场景：纳法里奥博士目睹爱德华多抓走了露西，意识到大事不妙的他立刻通知格鲁。

Dr. Nefario：Crikey. 

环境：爱德华多的私人庄园

场景：经过一番激烈的战斗，格鲁、纳法里奥博士和女儿们净化了所有小黄人，把爱德华多逼到了绝境。

23:41 转场

23:43 音乐渐进，小黄人尖叫后

Gru：It's over, El Macho. Now where is Lucy? 

23:50 El Macho (chuckles)：Let me show you. 

场景：爱德华多按下按钮，喷泉内升起了一个绑着露西、炸药和鲨鱼的火箭。

23:53 按钮声，火箭升起声后

Lucy：Oh, hey Gru! Turns out you were right about the whole El Macho thing, huh? Yay!

24:04 El Macho：One push of this button and I send that rocket straight into the same volcano where I faked my death. Only this time, it's for real!

Gru：No!

24:16 El Macho：We could've ruled the world together, Gru. But now, you're gonna die.

场景：格鲁掏出露西的临别赠礼口红电击枪，给爱德华多来了下狠的。

24:29 超长电击声，倒地声后

Gru：Lipstick taser! 

Lucy：（宠溺）Aw, he copied me. 

场景：格鲁奋力攀爬着火箭，试图救下露西。

24:45 激烈的音乐声同

Lucy：Don't worry about me, Gru! I'll be fine. I have survived lots worse than this. Okay, that's not entirely true.（惊慌）I'm actually kind of freaking out up here! 

Gru：Don't worry, I will get you out of this! 

场景：那只公鸡注意到了地上的遥控器，一口啄了上去。

25:03 两人吸气声，按钮声后

Gru：I really hate that chicken. 

场景：格鲁手忙脚乱试图拆卸火箭控制器停止制导。

25:09 巨大火箭起飞声后

Lucy：（急）Is there a red one? It's usually the red one. Gru, anytime now! 

（对话节奏变慢）

Gru：Woo! Listen, Lucy, we may not get out of this alive, so I need to ask you a question. 

Lucy：Uh, better make it quick! 

Gru：If I'd asked you out on a date, what would you have said? 

Lucy：Are you kidding me?! Yes! 

25:43 重音后

Gru：Jump!!!

场景：俩人在火箭射入火山前跳下，落入海中。

25:46 爆炸声，落水声后

Gru：（大声）Oh! Lucy! Lucy! Where are you?!

26:02 露西出水声后

Gru：Oh, Lucy! 

Lucy：Gru! 

场景：露西激动地扑了上去，两人又淹进海里。

26:07 入水声，出水声后

Lucy：Sorry, I guess you kind of need your arms to tread water, huh? 

场景：两人对视，小黄人们划着救生艇经过，丝毫没有注意到边上的主人。

26:15 Tom：Mack-oh! Mack-oh! Mack-oh! Mack-oh! Mack-oh! 

Gru：They'll be back... 

环境：婚礼现场

场景：147天后，格鲁与露西的婚礼上，艾格尼丝献词。

26:29 转场

26:31 Agnes：Okay. Excuse me! Um, hi! Excuse me! Uh. hi, everybody! I'd like to make some toast. Uh... She um, she um, she kisses my booboos. She braids my hair. We love you mothers, everywhere! And my new mom Lucy is beyond compare. To the bride and Gru! 

小黄人版本YMCA!

特别感谢：紫拉加奈！！！

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